Introductions!

Hi Divas!
 In this episode I'll introduce myself to new listeners, and explain the origins of Diva Worship! Follow me @allenstarby.

Transcript

[00:00:10] Hello, everyone. 

[00:00:13] Welcome to Diva Worship. Here I am. Hi, everyone. Hi, welcome to Diva Worship, where we dish, dissect and defend our divas.

[00:00:26] My name is Allen Darby. This first episode is going to be me introducing myself to anyone who doesn't know me. Although I assume, like the twelve of you that are actually listening, our friends, family or hopefully family.

[00:00:39] Oh, gosh, if nobody listens, I'd be kind of disappointing. But here we are. Here I am. So, you know, it's I'm going to I'm going to timestamped this one. You know, it's twelve twenty five a.m.. It's it's a little after midnight. I finally got some quiet. I've got my dog on my bed behind me. He's licking his paws. Need to take to the vet probably for a checkup. But here I am.

[00:01:06] Hi.

[00:01:08] Hi. So hi, my name's Allen Darby. I'm an actor, a singer, a director, a choreographer, writer and a current MFA student at American Conservatory Theatre's MFA program. I already said MFA, didn't I?

[00:01:26] Gosh, I'm nervous is so funny that I'm nervous just talking to a microphone in my room with headphones on like a kind of silly person. Anyway, so this so this episode is just me introducing myself. So firstly, to introduce myself, I am non binary. I use they/them pronouns.

[00:01:47] For those of you who don't know, that means I don't identify as solely male or solely female. I identify as both or neither. Or somewhere in between. And even though I was I was assigned male at birth. You'll hear me sometimes say AMAB or AFAB. That's what that means. Assigned male at birth. Assigned female at birth. But anyway, that's that's so technical and it's so boring. It's really all just a way of me saying, like, I'm effeminate, I'm queer, I'm gay. Get used to it or get the fuck out. You know, like, get over it. Like, I'm fabulous, you know it. You love it. Like, worship me like the diva I am anyway.

[00:02:27] And so this is so anyway, that leads me to my next thing. This is a podcast where we celebrate femininity and that's what we're gonna do. I'm gonna explain a little bit of the beginnings of this podcast. So when I was a young child and I'm getting. When I was as a junior in college at USC. So that was. Oh, goodness. That was a while ago.

[00:02:55] But anyway, when I was a junior in college at USC, there's this class called Writing 340. At least there was I don't know, all things change over there. They don't change fast enough. You do if you ask me. But I was there's this class called Writing 340, and I was always really nervous as a writer in my writing, especially then because just, you know, family stuff. And my mom always kind of told me, you know, that I could work on my writing. It always came from a place of love, though, and, you know, sending love to her now. But anyway, so there was this class called Writing 340 and was about persuasive writing, yadda, yadda, yadda, blah, blah, blah, boring, boring, boring B.S.. BSB asked, but I decided for my final paper for that class to write a paper on divas and you know me this like little queer kid, you know, studying theater and musical theater and learning my my time steps. And then I'm in this class with these beauties like USC is notorious for having, like the most beautiful students ever. I was in this class with like very smart people and very beautiful people and somewhere kind of like tools like, you know, so the engineering students just had no social skills and were kind of rude. But anyway, we had to submit our first drafts for this paper, and I did.

[00:04:11] And I was really nervous and people liked it. And I was like, what? Really? Oh, OK, cool. Like, this is this is interesting. So in that paper I defended how divas and Diva Ship Diva heard whatever, you know, the entomology or semantics of that is they're vital to culture because they push art forward by demanding greatness from themselves and from the masses as divas should. And we idolize divas, you know, even the word itself that the word diva, it's derived from the Latin word for goddess. You know, I think they use you know, that's easily moves into day. Davar into diva. I don't know. I'm not a linguist. Guys, just leave me alone. But it has gone through further definitions. This word diva. So it's gone through the definition of meaning a female opera singer, typically a soprano or soprano, however you want to be. Do she and said to a pop diva, you know, we all know those are beyond, say, Britney Gaga, Adele, you know, name that like the countless divas we have all the way to, you know, the current definition that we have. And I really don't like it. Well, I do and I don't. But the current definition we have is a self-important person who is temperamental and difficult to please parentheses, typically use of a woman and parentheses. So. 

[00:05:36] I'll say it again, quote, A self-important person who is temperamental and difficult to please. Parentheses typically use of a woman parentheses. End quote. So I disagree. I disagree with the connotation of this definition, but not necessarily with the content. And so let's break it down. So a self-important person usually means they're self-made. And if they're not self-made, they're usually self-sustained. And if they're not self-sustained, then they usually have money or influence to get them by, which they generally got from years of hard work. And it's not easy to achieve. So that's one temperamental. Haven't we all lost our cool's at inopportune moments? I know I have. And I'm an adult and I can say that without shame. We're in a post shame society. Or at least we should be people. It is picture somebody walking around with this in their headphones and then they hear me say that they're just like, God, shut up and get to the point, Dabi. So I've lost my cool at an opportune times and divas have to. But generally I wouldn't say a loser cool any more than like anybody else. Those truly, you know, only, you know, they're surrounded by people demanding greatness of them. And maybe they just want to take a break. And, you know, now, like with the how people can like easily, easily like see someone do something like that. We would call, quote unquote, diva behavior and then they can tweet about it.

[00:07:09] Sorry, my shoulder just popped my bad. Okay. Next part of the definition, difficult to please. Another way of saying they don't accept mediocrity. Come on. Like, I don't accept mediocrity and neither should you. And like some people. To some people, mediocrity is their best. Actually, no, I totally disagree with that. Like, if you if your act actually doing your best, it wouldn't be mediocre. You know what I mean? I'm going to stand by that. And I think divas see that in a good diva can usually smell that out if somebody is not doing their best. I'll be like, now, I don't want you in my camp. And then someone will be like, well, fuck you. I can't believe you did that. It's like, no, actually, they're just like standing up for, like, how good they are. And then the last part typically used of a woman, typically used of a woman. Now, girl, you got it. That's just sexist. Come on. Like, don't even pretend. Don't even pretend. We can't we can't say that we can't. Yeah. So here's the thing. This is not a podcast solely about dismantling the patriarchy, though. That's part of it. But it you know, this is a podcast about celebrating femininity and the talented artists and just freaking goddesses that we worship because of their talent. Now, speaking of worshiping these goddesses, what a word.

 [00:08:39] You know, we worship singers, actors, comics, entrepreneurs, reality show stars. And we also, as we're worshipping them, we do protect them. I can't tell you the number of times I've been honored at a dinner party. You have a smoking a footlong cigarette and drinking champagne and caviar. And, you know, somebody like I'll say something or somebody else will say something about some diva or pop star. And all of a sudden, like, someone will, like, clutch their pearls. It's a great dinner party. Also, just picture it. You know, it's hazy gems, pearls and crystal chandelier isn't mirrors everywhere. And, you know, the culture is like, what did you just say about Britney Spears or what did you just say about Lady Gaga? For me, it's. What did you say about Audra McDonald? Well, usually usually for me, it's like you don't know who Artie McDonald is. Excuse me. How dare you? And so this moment happens and then everyone has to either walk on eggshells or someone like Charlie won't give a fuck. And those speak like, yeah, I said it. Get over it. And it's just like. And then, you know, I'm like. But her the rest of the night. But this this this phenomenon of like protecting a diva and feeling the defensive for this diva. It just fascinates me. So I have a segment in the show, every episode called Defend Your DVR, where the guest will either tell a moment when they, like, had to defend their diva or they will like like remember it or they will, like, say what they wanted to say to that person, like, you know, staircase wit sort of thing of like, well, if that person had actually known anything, you know, some like that, it's going to be very, very fun.

[00:10:14] You know, it's it's very fun. Then, you know, also come on like this. Now we get into the meat of it. You know, the the OK, I'm rambling now. It's not lost on me that queered divas are queer. People are responsible for a lot of divas fame. Let me say that again, a little like queer people help elevate a lot of divas and their fame. We elevate and we idolize the divine feminine. Since time immemorial, like, you know, first it was the opera stars of the day and then it was moved on to, you know, jazz and rap. I'm not going to go through the music, his music history lesson. I don't care. But gay people love their divas like it even just since the 80s. You know, you look at Madonna and then you look at the Gagas and you look at the Beyonce's. You all, like I said before. We've always been there, we've always loved seeing a queen just embody fabulousness, like that's what Darrag also is like. The celebration of the celebration of femininity.

[00:11:24] You think of ball culture. You think of posed like watching a beautiful woman be beautiful and just like own it. Just fucking fucking own it. Come on. Like, that's what we that's what we love. Unless, you know, you're. So, listen, terrible and I don't know, part of like a right wing conspiracy. I don't care. I don't even want you in my brain right now. So we've we love seeing a queen like that embody fabulousness, you know, be it in music or acting or fashion or business. Think about like The Real Housewives, you know what I mean? Like the the LGBT community, LGBT. Q I'm a plus community stands. We just stand like just in general we just stand. But society like everyone else, is getting to this society, namely the patriarchy, also likes to tear down Diva's. They like to tear them down. And, you know, queer people do too. We're not blameless in this. You know, we tear divas down to like queer people. We are quick to double's have that like we are quick to buy a ticket to go see Adul. And, you know, then we're also quick to bash you. Not like you see Edell like and when you know and the recently she had a Facebook or an Instagram picture where she lost a lot of weight and then everyone had to say something about it and it's like, leave the woman alone.

[00:12:50] She's fabulous. Leave her alone. Like let her live her life. So I've thought of an analogy for this. You know, we love like people love a sports car, like I like a Lamborghini. I would never buy a Lamborghini because you know, the environment and like I would before that. But like like a Lamborghini is a sexy car. Everybody loves a sexy car. They also love to watch a car crash and burn when you can't take your eyes away. You know, there's nothing like. You think about a Judy Garland who like was like the most famous woman and singer and most like incredible performer and gay people like you kind of love watching them crash and burn. You know, you think about a Britney when she shaved her head. You think about Lindsay Lohan's, you know, you think about when Amanda Bynes you like. And there's so many more I can't even think of, like where we love to watch them rise and we love to watch them just like swan dive down. There's nothing there's nothing more thrilling. And I don't say this lightly, I don't say it. I don't even say it like comically. It's just like a phenomenon like there's nothing more thrilling than watching a supernova become a black hole. You know what I mean? And like every diva has haters and truly no diva has escaped.

[00:14:08] That's like every diva has had bad press, paparazzi and Internet trolls, just people trying to tear them down. And sometimes the haters win. And it's really sad and it's really terrible.

[00:14:19] And yet it's. Here's the thing, fam.

[00:14:25] These divas still thrive. There's like there's never a shortage. The checks keep clear in and they're still fabulous. There's so many. And that does say something about that, like consumerism of our culture, of just like, oh, you know, don't like one can get another one, but also that like. I don't like there's so many to choose from. Like the vast genres Bittu of Justin music divas, like you look at a Nicki Minaj, you look at a Diana Ross. You look at Beyonce. Say, you look at a Britney Spears. You look at a Lady Gaga. You look and then not even thinking about Broadway divas. You look at a party Lupo's, you look at an odd drawer. You look at a Bernadette Peters, you know, or my friend Taylor. Amon Jones. Coming up, diva. She's gonna be embarrassed. They put that in this episode. But you know, she's a diva as is is on her way because she's a fucking star. But you look at this vast array of like they're all it's truly apples and oranges. You can't compare them. You know what I mean? They're still fabulous. They're still here. And I just I just I just fucking love that about them. So I swear I'm getting to the end of this. I'm not going to keep you here forever. So anyway, after I graduated, blah, blah, blah, you know, life goes on, life happens and, you know, you'll learn about me and if you don't know already. But, you know, I moved back to San Francisco.

[00:15:43] And then about four years ago, my friend Brooke, who's gonna be in an episode, she and I decided to make a podcast called Live in La Diva. Look, we we do we did a ton of research to do an expose each week on a different diva. And it was so fun. I loved diving in and like exploring each divas, specifically their music. So we did like one on Eartha Kitt, one on Bette Midler, and we were starting to do one on Margaret Cho. And we just it we like didn't really get it out there. We didn't like, publish it anywhere, you know, we were like we're just, you know, like dicking around really are like fucking around. You got to think of a fooling around. So, you know, you know, anyway, so we didn't really publish them, and then Brooke went to Europe for a few months and then she moved to New York with her boyfriend, Nick, who's now her fiance, say. And they're still oh, I love them so much. Oh, my gosh. They have a little dog down in the weeds. I just I just I absolutely adore them. They're just such good people. They're so nice. And we we became friends because we took an acting class together. And I told like somebody asked, like we were had to say something about ourselves, the beginning of class. And I remember saying, well, what do you like? Somebody said, would you like to do for fun? I was like, Oh, well, you know, I like to watch Drag Race and Knit.

[00:17:06] And I remember her, like, tilting her head back and like smiling and just going like. Yes. Was it so specific to me? Maybe she cackled. I don't know. But anyway. So. So we did this. We started live in La Diva Loca. We never really finished it. And, you know, it kind of like fizzled out a little bit. And so after that, I was I you know, I got into grad school, I and I. After four years of trying. And so I didn't really. But you can listen to any of the other podcasts I've been on where I talk about my journey there. But I didn't really think I would do a podcast again, you know, maybe like years down the road, like maybe do so, but or whatever. And then, you know, during my second year in grad school, almost a little bit more than halfway through the COVID 19 pandemic hit, you know, you all know what I'm talking about. We're all in it now. And the world changed. The world's fucking changed. I mean, like Miss Rona, the biggest diva of them all. She's altered our timeline. This diva has changed everything. She's one diva. I would like to see it go away. And yet, you know, she's not going anywhere. You know, even that diva just stays around fuckin. Beast, I would use the other B word, but I know people who don't like that word and I'm trying my best to delete it from my lexicon. 

[00:18:36] But yeah, Miss rona, just fuck off. You know what I mean? And the metaphor sticks. You know, she's still here. She's she's still thrives anyway. So we're all stuck inside to keep the vulnerable safe. And we're all going through a depression. And then these George Floyd protests are happening and the protests for Breonna Taylor and the countless black women, Toyin Salau and non binary people who are these uprisings, which I fully support because truly, like Black Lives Matter, Black Trans lives matter. Black enby lives matter. It makes. I do not understand anyone who disagrees with me anyway. Small diatribe. But it's important. Like it it you know, I just don't even have words because it makes no sense to me how anyone could be against this movement. And yet they are. Because this movement is important. It is essential. And I fully support people who in any way, shape or form that they need to. I have donated more money than I buy. Probably logistically should, but surely don't care at this point because it's helping out people who need it. So anyway, all that to say, I swear my my brain, it I think I said this to a friend the other day where my brain is like a pinball machine, but the ball will always come back to the flipper. I swear that, like, these moments are really fucking heavy.

[00:19:56] You know, it's hard to find joy. It's hard to find anything to smile about. You know what I mean? And so I've been recording these episodes. Like, spoiler alert. I pre-recorded a few episodes and they've brought me joy. And so that's what I want to do with this podcast. I it's it's a moment with my friends to laugh at it, have fun, connect, reconnect with people who I haven't talked to in years, and then new people who I'm going to interview. And a chance to celebrate beauty, celebrate talent, celebrate. Joy, celebrate the feeling that we get when someone moves us to our core and like changes our body chemistry and changes are are muscles and our bones, you know, like I'm like just thinking about it. Like, if you're in a Broadway show and someone sing something and you just like you feel it and you're changed. The first time you listen. The first time I listen to like an Adele album and you just you're changed. You know, that's what I want to talk about. That moment, that that time that like. And that just like that. The metamorphosis that queer people and women and all people of all genders and sexualities they experience when a diva truly fucking changes their fuckin life. That's what I want to talk about. That's what I want to connect with. I'm snapping my fingers is probably ruining the take. And I don't care who did it.

[00:21:26] This is it. It just cause.

 [00:21:29] This this is a time of radical change happening right now. It's so important, it is essential to have this change happen. And it's also essential to have fun. Find joy. And remember these moments and to truly just connect with someone and have fun. You know what I mean? So. All that to say, how long have I been recording and boring you? Twenty, twenty two minutes. My goodness. And you stuck through it all. Here's here's what I have to say. This podcast, it's a podcast to celebrate, to defend, to and to just uplift these divas and to uplift ourselves. It's his chance to gab his a chance to spell t it's a chance to to just have fun and beef, sassy and feminine and queer and just live our best lives. So my guests are going to include some some Broadway actors, hopefully not not another. They'll be here. I trust you. I trust some singer songwriters, some drag queens, some other actors, some performers, some like queer people who are just like with it. And in the know and just know more than me about a lot of shit and my MFA classmates and my friends from childhood. There's going to be so many people, each of them is going to tell me about their favorite diva and defend them to their very last breath. And, you know, I mean.

[00:22:54] Sorry. I just burped. I'm not going to pretend that didn't happen, you all. Thank you for. Thank you for listening.

[00:23:03] And please rate five stars, give subscribe on Apple podcasts or Stich or wherever this broadcast is showing up, because I had to do a lot of work to get listed on a lot of those places and give me a five star review and tune in next week. The week after.

[00:23:21] And I hope you'll enjoy. I've had so much fun talking to my friends and it's it it does. It just brings me so much joy. I hope it brings it to you too.

[00:23:31] Stay safe out there. Drink water and come worship your Devault with us. I'll see you soon.

[00:23:44] Diva Worship is a podcast hosted by me, Allen Darby, my cover art was created by Jose Hernandez. You can follow him @j.c.art. He's brilliant. Give him a follow. I, the creator of this podcast, believe Black Lives Matter. Dreamers belong here. Trans women are women, trans men are men, and non binary people are themselves. Ableism is bullshit. If your space or event is not accessible for all people, it is not a space. I want to occupy. Also I acknowledge at the land on which I record this podcast is located on the occupied territories of the Ohlone People and the coastal Miwok. That's it. Drink water, stay safe and remember to defend the stars you love. I'll see you next week, Divas. Bye.